The Little Reminders

Today, I finally felt that I could start to go through some of mom’s drawers to move some things out.  I started simply with just the socks and undergarments. While emptying the first drawer, this music box began playing spontaneously.  Can’t help but feel that Mom’s spirit was encouraging me. 

Mom’s music box, slowly turning and playing a sweet song.

Thankful for these little reminders.

A Healing Place and Memorial Tree

“I’m sure that no one knew how important it was to Mom that they were forming invisible bonds.”

Some years back, Mom discovered a hollowed-out oak  at her favorite park near home. Despite years of breakdown and decay at its base, sprigs of new growth stretched up towards the sky, reaching for the warmth and light of the sun, and that resonated with her soul. Mom began leaving little trinkets inside the cleft, and before long, others were leaving mementos and notes, too, and a beautiful rapport was established between strangers. I’m sure that no one knew how important it was to her that they were forming invisible bonds.  For Mom, writing notes and letters was vital because she couldn’t spend time in the presence of other people due to her autoimmune disorder. She could take solo walks in nature, though, and here is where she found renewal.

Mom’s Memorial Tree

As interactions between herself and other visitors to the tree increased, so did her elaboration of decor. With every turn of the seasons, she tidied up the old things and added something new and whimsical to the battered trunk.

She sent me pictures of her handiwork via text but never said exactly where the tree was located in the 84-acre wooded park.  This was the picture she sent to me in December 2022,  during her final outing when she visited the tree for the last time and decorated it for the yuletide.

Mom’s last decoration

When things settled after Mom’s death in April 2023, I set out to find her tree, and with a little help from the guiding spirit, I came upon it, not too far from a walking trail, but looking a bit disheveled after five months of neglect.

Mom’s tree, looking a bit disheveled in May 2023

It was truly delightful to discover her special place. I cleaned everything up, read all the notes, and came back the next day with fresh flowers and trimmings. 

Strangers bonding through their mutual recognition of resilience.
A few more notes between unseen friends at Mom’s tree.

I have been returning periodically to refresh the decor.  This spring, I found that several dozen trees were cut out of the area to make room for trail improvements. I braced myself for the possibility that Mom’s tree might have been taken down with the others, but happily, it’s still standing. 

Changes for the seasons 2023: spring, Independence Day,  Mom’s 82nd birthday, and autumn. 

On Mom’s birthday, I brought a gift and left it for whoever felt the need to take it.  That would have been how Mom would have loved a gift to be shared. I kept going back to check on it, and four months later, nobody had taken it.  The box itself was full of goodies and even included $60 cash. No one ever took it, so I brought a friend to the tree whom I knew to be in a hard place in their life and offered the gift to them.

Gift for whomever needed it, in honor of Mom’s first birthday in heaven.

Someone left this note, which has given our family a reason to send healing thoughts and prayers for their safety and well-being. I hope our readership will also send warm, loving, and healing energy to these folks and all their loved ones as well.

Someone to keep in our thoughts and prayers.

Today was the most lovely spring day to go out for a long, meandering bike ride. The sun was shining, temperatures in the mid-50s, with a light southerly breeze. I took my time going about twenty miles and stopped in by Mom’s tree to see what was new.  How wonderful to find this letter addressed “to family of this mother“.  I can not express how touching this is, and I’m thankful to be the recipient of this altruistic love. It is an extension of Mom’s good work in the world. I hope the park planners will continue to let this old oak flourish despite its broken-down looks.  It is a healing place for all.

Special note from a new friend.

Nancy’s Sunshine

Whatever challenge is put before you, while there may or may not be a cure, there is always help from the earth.

~ Nancy’s Sunshine

Nancy lived from 1941 to 2023 and she was my mom. She lived the life of an uncommon woman, having been one of the earliest individuals diagnosed with an autoimmune condition in the 1970s and navigating the rest of her life with multiple chemical sensitivities, allergies, susceptibility to viruses and bacterial infections, systemic candida, SIBO, and a host of uncomfortable, sometimes debilitating symptoms that healthier folks like myself had a hard time understanding. After the early passing of my dad at the turn of the millennium, much of her existence was spent in isolation, inside her home, where she built a simple sanctuary that was free from toxic chemicals and beautiful to be in. Nancy remained curious, upbeat, and positive throughout her trials, and even took inquisitive interest in her own end-of-life process. She built a community of love and support through letter writing, sending beautiful greeting cards, sending elaborately wrapped gift packages to loved ones, and the fellowship of others, like herself, who were suffering with unseen, chronic health conditions.

As an early sufferer of environmental illness, as it was called back in the 70s, she developed one of our state’s first support groups for people with autoimmune issues. Because of her multiple chemical sensitivities, she had to strip her home of almost everything that was not constructed of 100% natural, organic fibers, including her clothing, bedding, furniture, and flooring. Before Dad passed away, he hunted white-tailed deer in our home state and mule-deer in the mountains out west, as well as trapping rabbits and growing an organic vegetable garden in our back yard. It was not easy to obtain organically grown food and fibers in the 1970s through 1990s, not like it became in the 2000s. Mom was one of the first people in our home town to wear surgical masks in public, four decades before the Covid-19 pandemic led almost everyone to don them with regularity. Mom and I marveled at the turning of tides, when her way of self protection was no longer an oddity, but the new norm: who would have believed that we would live to see the day when so many others wore masks? During the pandemic, Mom actually enjoyed greater health than she did prior to it because her carefully planned, early-morning trips to the grocery store or other errands no longer exposed her to as many of the invisible, airborne viruses that had been the norm before people were actively wearing masks in public settings.

In a colloquial fashion, Mom’s loving support for people with chronic dis-ease grew into a life-long mission of helping others that she maintained right up until her passing. She became a learned, naturopathic teacher who shared in the journeys of thousands of people whose conditions were no longer able to be helped by mainstream medicine. She wisely taught on organic products, safe food packaging and handling, elimination of grooming goods that use heavy perfumes and dyes, safe cleaning supplies and practices, self-help through multiple modalities like Reiki, reflexology, meditation, exercise, emotional processing, and breath work, as well as nutritional supplements and herbs that could assist towards a more comfortable and functional existence despite enduring afflictions. She became friends with and studied directly with healers like Hanna Kroeger, Doctor John Christopher, and Master Herbalist, Steven Horne. She applied herself to learning about traditional Chinese, Ayurvedic, and traditional Western herbalism. She believed in the mind, body, and spirit connection for total wellness, and left us with one last message upon her death: when the earth was created, nothing was forgotten. Whatever challenge is put before you, while there may or may not be a cure, there is always help from the earth. We are living in a chemical-ridden world and must be wise and thoughtful in taking care of our bodies, striving to eat the foods in their natural states, as created by God, and not filled with artificial ingredients created by mankind. She left us in 2023 with a sense of deep gratitude for her difficult journey and its lessons, and for the honor of being a part of so many people’s healing paths as they allowed her to share what she learned.

This site is dedicated to my mom, Nancy, who brought sunshine into all her relationships no matter how difficult her own struggles. Mom chronicled many of her health and nutritional programs which will be discussed here as time goes on and I wade through her papers. Many people reached out since her funeral, sharing that they held on to her communications for decades, returning to them often for ongoing guidance; others are asking for access to her files so they can continue their self-care with the help of Mom’s methods. I will use this site to share her wisdom and extend the reach of her important healing work beyond the span of her natural lifetime. For now, I bid you adieu with love and light from Mom.